what URNA means to me

By Lisa Cole November 14 2015

An incident in Chat tonight made me really stop and think what URNA means, to me and to others.

I came to URNA over 14 years ago.

Same story as so many others. Had them feelings, lived in secret, wondered if I was just plum crazy. Back then this world was an unknown. There was very little information, and no one was talking.

I found URNA by an Internet search, just typing in phrases:, “I feel like a girl”, “Boys wearing women’s clothing”, and there it was, You Are Not Alone…….URNA

Prior to that, I did the guy thing well, had nearly everyone fooled. I excelled in sports, cut firewood for a living, worked out, lifted weights, hunted, fished and did Korean karate. I was married, have two children, and was the dad every kid dreamed of having.

My decision to look for answers was in part due to the growing up of my boys. I stood strong till they were old enough to make their own way in life. But by then, I had to find out who I was, and why I felt as I did. URNA, there it was. Search had found something!!!!

So reluctantly, I filled out a profile, and snuck into Chat. Yep, you know, I didn’t say a word, just sat there, reading the posts. A few days of that and I was chatting. I’ve learned a lot by being here. Ive learned that so many are just like me. They too are scared at times, excited at the little victories, and hurt by the realties of life sometimes.

I’ve learned that URNA is about more then makeup and girl stuff. It is our sanctuary. The one place where everyone can be who they are inside. It’s a place without the criticisms of appearance, as so many of us face the same issues. A place where others understand our trials, that are unique to us.

I had SRS back over 13 years ago, A Schrang Girl. My transition is just history now, memories, most bitter sweet. Many were two steps forward and three steps back.

I’m asked often why im here. To that I reply, “I pay it forward, and I owe it back” …To the girls then, and the girls now. URNA was here when I needed it. It was there through a 6 year transition, through SRS and relearning life. I’ve made new friends, and lost dear friends.

The recent change in ownership also gave me food for thought.

I heard it said once, that the United States of America, in all respects, should not be. That so many times, we were out gunned, out numbered, and totally the under dog. Yet time and time again, we emerged victorious. The author stated, that he felt, “only by divine Provence”, was this possible. URNA is no different, 20 years now, on a shoe string budget, the old owner ready to turn off the lights, lock the door and someone steps up. Only on URNA…….

We are part of a blessing. URNA is, we are all a part of it, as much as it is a part of many of us. Pay it forward, pay it back…

Lisa Coles