Ask Jane, A Request from Jane
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A Notice to All CDs: Would You Help Me, Please?
Greetings and happy summer! I write you from beautiful Barbados ... a long way from this Colorado girl's roots.
I would like to ask a favor of you.
Would you be willing to share your experiences with me as a crossdresser? Specifically, I want to communicate with CDs who are or have been in committed relationships with women ... women who were told or who discovered that you crossdressed. What were her fears and concerns?
I will be speaking in September at Southern Comfort; my topic is the fears wives (or SOs) have when they find out their husbands crossdress. Some fears are obvious: She fears he's gay. She fears she caused his crossdressing. Etc. If you would be willing to talk about these and any other fears your SO has had, would you please drop me a line? Anything you say to me will be held in strictest confidence, of course. Any part of your story that I share in my talk will be disguised to protect your identity.
If you'd rather talk than write, let me know and we'll arrange a phone conversation. I look forward to getting to know some of you better through this exercise, and am most grateful for your participation in my research on this topic.
I thank you and look forward to meeting any of the URNA community who attend SCC.
All best regards,
Jane Vargas, Ph.D.
jane@jane.tv
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Grace 7/05/2008 19:13 Hi Jane, I am the wife of a CD'r. I knew from the "friendship" part of my relationship that he was a crossdresser. It's important that the partners od CD'rs understand that CD'ing isn't about sexual preference. The obstacles for me after 2 yrs of marriage are trust. He hides interent sites and prfiles. Trust is the biggest issue for me. I need to know his actions as it helps me feel secure that I am the only LOVE in his life. I am afraid he "secretly" wishes to be with a TG/TV or TS.
Princess Stephanie Couturier 11/08/2007 20:48 (continued) eclectic lifestyle and relationship. To correspond with you, e-mail would be fine or maybe a phone conversation might be more efficient. Either way, let us know. We would like to share anything we can contribute in order to possibly help others in the same or a similar situations. Best of our Love! Stephanie (I also am a Colorado girl who loves the islands. How was Barbados?)
Princess Stephanie Couturier 11/08/2007 20:43 Hi Jane! I realize this is a bit "after the fact" since you posted this request last summer but I would be happy to share my experiences as a life long "cutie-pie" crossdresser (according to my lovely wife) as well as a fit and masculine-looking man. I have been married to my wonderful SO for over 10 years and she loves sharing my special fascination of crossdressing and adoration of lingerie, shoe and such. As is human nature, we always have our challenges and unanswered questions but we seem to have a very good loving relationship despite the fears that may arise from our eclectic
Sharon 9/22/2007 07:02 Linda Evans post came through my email and I felt strongly I needed to comment. I basically have given up hoping to find a girlfriend and a loving, happy relationship. I no longer consider myself to be a CD because I live full time as a woman; but in anger and hurt I have to state publicly that I find some women are insecure, selfish louts when it comes to this matter- "Well, if you cross dress and look like a woman what does that make me?" My answer to that is always the same- why does it make you anything different than what you already are?? I want to quote a now deceased friend whom
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